Today, we enjoyed a Gay bonfire.
Yes, you read me correctly.
A Gay bonfire.
Mr. and Mrs. Gay joined us for a bonfire in the backyard.
In addition to the Gays joining us for a bonfire, Uncle Tommer made an appearance as well.
In his 1992 green two-door Toyota Tercel.
I mentioned (in my very sassy, mouthy way) that in the nine years that I had been coming to West Virginia, I had never eaten a piece of Uncle Tommer's world-famous, perfectly-frosted, made-from-scratch, oh-so-very-sinfully-looking, chocolate cake.
One of these cakes was present at the 90th birthday party, but I missed out.
So, Uncle Tommer said that he thought there was one more piece left at his house.
And I replied, (in my very sassy, mouthy way) "I am WAITING!".
So Uncle Tommer headed for his Toyota Tercel.
Captain Jake Sparrow asked if he could go too.
"Sure," I said, since we're on vacation, and they were only going a mile, and "sure", you can ride up front, and "No, of course not", you don't need a car seat.
Vacation can be a very dangerous thing, people.
Especially if you are sittin' 'round a Gay bonfire.
So off they go. The Captain and Uncle Tommer.
All we could see was the very top of Jake's head, and his hand, waving out the window.
Upon return (30 seconds later), Uncle Tommer is carrying one beautiful slice of chocolate cake.
And Captain Jake Sparrow is running up the hill, screaming, "MOM!"
I, of course, assume he was injured.
"What happened, Jake?"
"MOM! That car is so FREAKIN' cool! MOM! You have gotta SALE me that car!"
"Jake? You want me to BUY you that car?"
"Yeah Mom! It is super fast, and super noisy and I GOTTA HAVE IT!"
Okay, are we still talking about the green 1992 Toyota Tercel here?
Yes, indeed, he is.
And are we still talking about my FOUR year old son?
Yes, indeed, we are.
I told Jake that if he wanted it, he would have to pay for it with his own money.
"Uncle Tommer! Can I buy that car for a dollar? I GOTTA HAVE IT! It is super fast and super cool and it has those roll up window thingies!" (can you believe my child has never seen roll up windows in his life??? God am I getting old....)
Uncle Tommer told him that car was awful special, and a dollar just wouldn't do it.
Jake just kept eyeing it.
He really covets that car.
REALLY covets that car.
P.S. - Uncle Tommer's cake was absolutely sinfully scrumptious. The only thing missing was a glass of cold milk. I substitued Shiraz instead.