Monday, March 30, 2009

Not Me Monday courtesy of MckMama!


When I was in high school, one hundred years ago, I was NOT an ugly duckling.

I have NOT since morphed into a beautifully fashionable, redheaded vixen, who just so happens to be UNboastful and UNprideful.

But I DIgress.

Back to the hell of puberty:

I did NOT have lesbian hair (NOT that there is anything wrong with that!).

I had NO fashion sense whatsoever.

I did NOT wear makeup. NONE.

I was NOT a complete and utter dork.

I was NOT a bookworm.

I was NOT a tomboy.

I was NOT as flat-chested as a two by four.






stuffed cottonballs into a bra I had NO reason to wear.


On the third day after giving birth to my first child, when my milk 'came in', I did NOT run butt-naked towards my husband screaming:

"Look at THESE!"

"They are HUGE!"

I did NOT go shirtless and braless all day.

I did NOT stare at them all day.

I did NOT play with them all day, between baby feedings, when I did NOT continue to stare at them in amazement.

I did NOT pray to God that I could keep them.

They were NOT hard as a rock.

They were NOT painful as hell.

They were NOT absolutely, positively, the most beautiful boobs I had ever seen in my life.


They did NOT disappear.


They did NOT.


1 comment:

  1. I cannot wait to have big pregnancy boobs. Because I too do NOT have the stuff my bra, just to look like a girl.