So we're American Idol fanatics in this tribe.
If you're not a fan, check back tomorrow, because this might bore you, or just fast forward to the Captain's commentary at the end.
We've been watching since Season One, the year of Kelly Clarkson, when I was pregnant with Reilly the Red.
Last year, the finale was, shall we say, difficult for Captain Jake Sparrow.
He couldn't understand how his favorite guy, Michael Johns, was voted off, then appeared again at the finale.
When David Cook won, he started to cry, thinking Michael Johns was given a second chance.
And Reilly the Red was screaming and crying because David Archuleta didn't win.
And it didn't help matters at all that I correctly (as always) predicted 13 weeks prior that David Cook was going to take the damn thing.
Nor did it help that I did the David-Cook-won-American-Idol-and-your-guy-didn't-while-I-smacked-my-fat-butt-dance.
Yes, we are SICK competitive. SICK - in the words of Judge #4, Kara.
We are picking our favorites, and making our finale bets.
Captain Jake Sparrow is remarking how pretty the girls are.
And I started to engage, with, "Really? Are they Really Pretty?"
Captain: "Yeah, Mom. They're pretty. You're pretty sometimes. But only when you wear makeup and pretty dresses."
UnPretty Mom: "So I'm not pretty right now?"
(shakes his head violently)
"Not right now."