You know those USB chargers for your cell phones that you can plug into the wall?
Captain Jake Sparrow found a new use for them.
Last night, he was supposed to be taking a bath.
Instead, I found him in front of the microwave (where the phone charger is located), butt naked (except he was still wearing his socks), doing the following:
He had the phone end of the charger on his penis.
I kid you NOT.
(friends, how many times in my life have I screamed "JAKE!"?)
"What are you doing?"
Captain Jake Sparow: "Trying to give energy to my pee-pee, like a super hero."
That's all I have to say.