Day Twenty Three - Magic Man

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Guess what ELSE I learned to do:

No, I didn't learn how to rope swing.

I finally learned how to post videos.

It's amazing the things you can force yourself to learn when you have a husband who loves to drive hundreds and hundreds of miles a day while you try to keep with a blog about an 8,000 mile vacation.

But I digress.

This video was Ropin' Reilly the Red, rope swinging in the Virgin River when we went tubing at Zion National Park the other day.

Today, we did this:

These cars were way too small and ridiculously too slow for Reilly the Red. Her go-kart at home would blow these ones out of the water. But she was a good sport about it.

And why is Jake doing the Detroit Lean? Because it's the only way he could reach the pedals?

Notice anything unusual about this picture?

How about NOW?

Yeah, I know, RIGHT? Where the heck did THOSE come from?

All I know is.....

What happens in Vegas, only God knows......

Okay, enhanced body parts and all, guess what happened next....and yes, now I'm just showing off...

Not only did he wreck a girl, but he ended up with a one inch cut near his right eye, which you will most likely see in photos in the next few days.

So far, two near-fatal injuries on this vacation.

Again, there's a reason we have AFLAC.

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We left the go-kart track, and everyone was starving, but we had a very limited time schedule, as we had to be somewhere else later.

So Two-Fisted Chris ordered out from one of his favorite haunts, the Teriyaki Bowl.

Sounded yummy to most of us.

On the way to pick up the food, Captain "Busted Eye" Sparrow exclaims:

"I'm starving".

We told him we were picking up food.

"What kinda food?"

Teriyaki Bowl.

"Yuck. I don't like Teriyaki Bowl it's disgusting."

Whatever, punk, you've never had Teriyaki Bowl, but you eat Teriyaki chicken wings like they're Laffy Taffy, so whatever.

The food gets in the car, and we head to the house.

"Yummmy. Something smells delicous! What is it?"

Seriously, he really said that.

At the house, he starts to eat his teriyaki chicken and rice in a bowl.

"I LIKE this stuff! This is GOOD!"

"Can I have some more?"

"Daddy, this tastes like your chicken wings!"

"What is this stuff called again?"

"I LIKE Teriyaki Bowl!"

If he didn't already have a black eye, three adults were definitely in the mood to give him one.

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Go-kart injury and teriyaki bowl menagerie notwithstanding, the Florida pirates headed to here:

The Lance Burton Magic Show at the Monte Carlo Hotel Casino.

We were trying to re-focus the vacation on the kids, as they were bored with looking at rocks (even though they were BILLIONS and BILLIONS of years old).

So Two-Fisted Chris thought this would be a good, family-friendly show.

And did I mention how awesome of a hospitality manager he is?

He was dead-on.

From the moment we entered the theater, the kids were mesmerized.

It didn't hurt matters that the usher who took us to our seat was slathering attention on my kids like butter on a biscuit.

Magic Usher was asking Billy and I where we were from.

Two Swords told him that he was born in WV and I was born in Pittsburgh, but that we were 'from' Florida.

And the Sparrow pipes up and said, "HEY MISTER! Don't you want to know where I was born?"

And Magic Usher says, "Of course I do!"

"Rohlando!"

"Orlando?"

"Yep! Rohlando!"

And then Magic Usher guessed that Reilly the Red was about 8.

She gently corrected him that she was 7.

He said, "well, I was pretty close."

And then the Sparrow pipes up again and says, "HEY! DON'T YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW OLD I AM?"

And Magic Usher said, "I know how old you are. You are FOUR."

For the first time in his life, Sparrow was speechless.

"HOW the HECK did THAT guy KNOW that I am FOUR?"

And Magic Usher replied, "It's MAGIC! Enjoy the show!"

For fifteen more minutes, Jake couldn't give it up. He was mystified.

And then the show began.

I'm not going to ruin the show for you, but if you are in Vegas with your children (which far be it for me to judge!), take them to the Lance Burton Magic Show.

My pirates had a blast.

And..............

They got called up on stage.

It might have had something to do with Reilly the Red's evening attire: