Uranus

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As most of you know, I suffer, no, I deal daily with having Crohn's Disease.

One of the sidebar notes to Crohn's Disease is that I have to take lots of different meds, for lots of different reasons.

But that's a story for another blog.

The real story is that for some reason, (the reason being the combination of really happy sleepy pills I take at night), I wake up every single morning with the most vivid of dreams.

And some of these dreams actually seem like they could come true. Or at least seem like a story someone might tell. Like a certain little Captain Jake Sparrow?

So here's the dream, as best as I can remember it, and you decide for yourself.


URANUS

So, we, as a family, are once again vacationing in West Virginia.

Captain Jake Sparrow, Billy Two Swords, and the old dudes, (Uncle Chuck, Mr. Gay, and Grandpa) are out working in Grandpa's shed, making a rocket ship. (Again, please keep in mind this is a dream).

So once they get the rocket ship built, which didn't seem like a very long time at all, Uncle Chuck and Grandpa take the first experimental trip.

And they made it to Uranus. And they called the house and said, "We made it. We're on our way home."

So they got home safely from Uranus.

They decided to make some minor adjustments here and there to the rocket ship, to see if maybe they could make it even further or faster, or something, while all the womenfolk (oh yes, including myself, just shook our heads at them).

All the while, Captain Jake Sparrow is his almost 5 year old self, watching everything, listening, never leaving his Daddy's or his Grandpa's side.

So the next trip, Billy Two Swords and Uncle Chuck decide to take the Captain, if that's okay with me, since the first trip was easey-peasey.

Me, being the non-inhibiting wife and mother that I am, who firmly believes in math and science, and that one shouldn't be denied opportunities of a lifetime, because they might crash and burn, hugs my baby and my baby, and tells them to call me on their way home.

So off they go. Destination unknown.

They got to Uranus. For whatever reason, they just didn't have enough power to get any further. They called the house, said they'd be home by supper, and sure enough, there they were! Safe and sound!

More working, more tweaking, more desperate to see how far they can go with this rocketship of theirs.

Well, one day, Billy Two Swords and Grandpa had to head to town early in the morning for more rocketship parts. They got up and out of the house before anyone else had woken up.

They returned, and everybody sat down to Grandpa's world famous biscuits and sausage gravy.

It seemed eerily quiet.

Suddenly, Two Swords and I realize that the Captain is not at the breakfast table.

So we go to his bedroom and see if he is still sleeping.

Nope.

We all start looking for him.

Nowhere to be found.

Grandpa goes out side, comes back inside, takes his hat off, rubs his forehead, and says, "Awww, hell!"

And Two Swords said, "No, he didn't."

And Grandpa says, "The heck he didn't! It's gone!"

Sure enough, the rocketship was gone.

And so was The Captain to end all Captains.

We waited and waited and waited and waited.

Couldn't really call the police, since they were breaking like 10 zillion laws.

At 330pm the phone rang.

I grabbed it.

"Jake?"

"Hi Mom! I'll be home by supper time. Did Grandpa make a pie?"

"Jake! Where are you?"

"Well, Mama, I'm in Uranus!"

"WHAT?"

"Just like Daddy was in Uranus, and Grandpa was in Uranus, and Uncle Chuck was in Uranus, and Mr. Gay was in Uranus."

"I was in Uranus just like everybody else was in Uranus!"


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