Sunday, February 6, 2011

America's Got Talent



I was busy today, trying to get the Sparrow and myself ready to go, and gather up some items, know, just get the heck out the door.

And then the mouth started.

"Hey Mom?"


"When does 'America's Got Talent' start again?"


"Cuz, I got me some talent."


"Yeah, I got me lots of talents."

Oh yeah?

"Yeah, and I really want to go on that show and show everybody my talents."

So, um, (and why-oh-why-oh-why-oh-why do I ask?) what are these alleged 'talents' of yours?

"Well, I can jump a shark on a dirtbike."





So, is the shark like dead, and in the front yard when you jump it on this um, dirt bike that you don't have?

"No way Mom, of course the shark is not dead and in the front yard, it's in a TANK! and I drive my dirt bike that I may not have YET, but I'll have it before America's Got Talent comes back on."

Uh, oh-kay.

"Mom! You didn't ask me my other talents."

Oh-buoy. There's more?

Okay, dude, what are your other talents?

"Well....I can carry a milk jug on my head while riding a tricycle."


"Yep. Sure can."

Geesh Jake, that sounds like something that a C L O W N would do.

"MOM! Stop it! You KNOW that clowns FREAK ME OUT!"


"So, you know that I can do a NOSE wheelie with the front wheel of a chopper, right?"

Nope, sure didn't know that Jake.

"Well, did you know that I can use sunglasses as a frisbee?"

Nope, but that would really be considered 'talent', for sure.

"So, how ya gonna get me on that show, Mom?"

I dunno Jake.

I don't got no talents.


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