Monday, June 7, 2010

Not Me! Monday

Oh buoy.

We Pirates do NOT have many, many, NOT ME's to report this week!

I am NOT counting the days until Reilly the Red is out of school for the summer (1.85!), as I am NOT exhausted from enduring the Sparrow all by myself each and every day.

His piehole does NOT runneth over!

Last week, I did NOT grab what appeared to be a pouch of frozen spaghetti sauce, defrost it, put in a pot with another bottle of 'fresh' sauce and prepare it for supper.  Billy Two Swords did not come home and say "ummm, are we having CHILI for supper?"  I had NOT mistakenly grabbed a pouch of CHILI and UNintentionally posed it as spaghetti sauce!  It was NOT disgusting.  The children did NOT hate it.  Reilly the Red did NOT say, "What is THIS?  Chili Spaghetti?"  Ugh.

Captain Jake Sparrow did NOT finally learn how to swim!  No he did NOT!  There were NOT a gaggle of witnesses!  His favorite Uncle -- Two Fisted Chris did NOT patiently work with him over and over and over again....

Speaking of favorite Uncle -- Two Fisted Chris -- MY BROTHER, did NOT teach my daughter WITH A BROKEN HEAD to jump into the pool ON TO A BOOGIE BOARD.  NO, he did NOT!

We did NOT have a little family gathering on Saturday, with two people named something like Mare A Dith in attendance.  It did NOT get a little confusing!

And NO, of course NOT, NO one would have consumed adult beverages at this gathering.  NOT frozen pina coladas made from SCRATCH with REAL pineapples in my new smoothie maker by my Martha Stewartesque, Bethenny-in-real-life, wonderfully creative sister in law Mermaidelicous!

And NO, I did NOT have a single ONE of those. 

NOT One!






  1. Not one or two but how many?? I have done something like the chili incident before too. We sucked it up. then I made Chris drive to mickey d's.

  2. Girl, you've earned those pina coladas!!! I might have to drink a few in your honor!