As NOT previously mentioned, I have NOT put on a few pounds.
A few pounds does NOT mean ahem, forty.
It most certainly does NOT!
I have NOT been, um, sick lately.
Sick does NOT mean ahem, taking lots of weird medicines for weird diseases.
Some of these medicines are NOT steroids.
I do NOT have a secret desire to stop shaving my pits and become an Eastern European bodybuilder.
I did NOT go out in public this weekend for a few hours to participate in a bit of community service.
I would NOT do such a thing, especially on a Saturday!
At aforeNOTmentioned community service event, I was NOT spotted by a fellow church congregant.
As I was NOT leaving this event, the church congregant did NOT say to me,
Oh how I wish this had NOT come out of her NOT very large mouth attached to her NOT very large head which does NOT have about eighteen chins...........
Oh how I wish she had NOT said:
"So are you pregnant or.........................................?"
Oh how I wish there had NOT been a pregnant pause!
I am NOT pregnant.